This past week has been incredibly challenging for Black women, many of whom feel a range of emotions — rage, sadness, grief, and even confusion. The election results reveal a reality we’ve long known but often try not to dwell on: for Black women, it can feel like no amount of effort, assertiveness, or resilience fully brings about the recognition, respect, and belonging we deserve. This election may leave you feeling invisible, questioning your worth, and confronting the harsh truth that our voices, needs, and dreams aren’t always valued as they should be.
As a therapist, I wish I had a simple answer for navigating this pain. But if this week has taught me anything, it’s that, sometimes, the best we can do is sit with our emotions, allowing them the space to breathe and unfold, while leaning into our strength and vulnerability. Below, I’ll share some practices that may help you hold these truths with both honesty and compassion.
1. Allow Yourself to Feel
If you feel yourself wanting to jump to solutions, fix your emotions, or push through, pause. Let yourself process what you’re feeling without bypassing or diminishing it. Notice if you tend to move quickly toward coping mechanisms or mental reframing. This impulse to fix, while protective, can prevent us from fully acknowledging our hurt. Allow your feelings to surface and give them the compassion and patience they deserve.
2. Evaluate Your Support Systems
In challenging times, it’s vital to rely on our community. Reflect on whether you reached out to trusted friends, family members, or therapists this week. If you felt alone or isolated, think about why that might be and what steps you can take to foster closer, more supportive relationships. If you find yourself hesitating to seek support, explore where that reluctance comes from and what you might need to feel safe and connected.
3. Lean Into Self-Care
This type of collective grief can awaken other losses in your life — relationships that have changed, loved ones who are no longer with us, or dreams that remain unfulfilled. Give yourself permission to grieve these as well. Engaging in self-care is a way of validating your worth and holding yourself gently in this challenging time. Make space for whatever nourishes your spirit, whether that’s a warm bath, a quiet walk, journaling, or simply sitting in silence.
4. Protect Your Peace with Radical Self-Compassion
In the days and months ahead, it’s crucial to guard your inner peace fiercely. Pay attention to your inner dialogue. Are you speaking to yourself with kindness, warmth, and understanding? If not, work on changing that. The messages we hear from the media and those in power can deeply influence our inner dialogue, so be mindful of what you consume. When negative emotions surface, bring awareness to your thoughts and replace them with words of loving kindness. Visualize someone who embodies compassion — maybe a loved one, a mentor, or even a spiritual figure — and let their voice guide you toward gentleness.
5. Reconnect with Your Body
Moving your body can help you process emotions and release stress. Dance, stretch, walk, or do any movement that feels grounding. Exercise helps release hormones that improve our mood, bring us back into our bodies, and remind us that we are capable and resilient.
6. Prioritize Spaces That Celebrate You
Finally, seek out spaces and relationships that remind you of your worth and uniqueness. Pursue your joy and happiness so fiercely that they become your anchor, your truth, and your armor. Remember that the world may never fully recognize your value, but your life, well-being, and happiness are yours to protect. Surround yourself with people who see and celebrate the remarkable woman you are.
In this time of collective grief and frustration, I am more committed than ever to creating therapeutic spaces that affirm your worth, center your culture, and offer you the support you deserve. If you’re seeking a place to process these emotions, I invite you to schedule a consultation. Healing is a journey we don’t have to take alone, and you deserve a space that honors you.
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